Tuesday 4 July 2017



Like an ATM who just wants to be loved.

Like an episode of the Rockford Files but with a guy in a moo-moo.

Like a baaaaad trip to Taco Bell.

Like a farting house of skin and testicles.

Like legions of space ninjas encountering a truck stop full of friggin’ mean gay dudes.

Like wearing mittens but calling them gloves but secretly calling them hitman gloves.

Like your dog saving your life or eating your corpse.

Like waiting for that dreamy prom date who probably stood you up on account of the apocalypse.

Like JUNK.

An okay collection of eight short stories from the following authors - Danger Slater, Jason Armstrong, Chris Rhatigan, Andrew Hilbert, Ryan Sayles, David James Keaton, Chris Leek and Eric Beetner.

There were a few new authors that I haven’t heard of before, a couple that I have books by but haven’t yet read – Chris Leek, Chris Rhatigan and Ryan Sayles and one old favourite – Eric Beetner.

A couple of the stories I kind of felt indifferent to which is a fairly typical response when viewing a collection as a whole. I don’t recall laughing too much either, but the book cost less than a £1 and I got a couple of hour’s entertainment value out of it, so I’m not going to complain.

PROM NIGHT By Danger Slater – a little bit sad, teenage insecurities and a girl getting stood up by her prom date, the apocalypse intervenes.

ASS TO MOUTH By Jason Armstrong – bizarre, if there was a point to it I missed it.

THE THINGS I NEED TO BE A HITMAN By Chris Rhatigan – mildly amusing, an office dweeb decides on a career change.

FLESH HOUSE By Andrew Hilbert - weird and frankly a little bit disturbing, but I really enjoyed it. The walls of a house start sprouting hair and eventually turn into body parts. Initially amusing, but I kind of felt claustrophobic as the tale progressed and the parts kept growing and oppressing the occupants of the house.

INVASION OF THE DEMON NINJAS, OR HOW A MODERN DAY BATHHOUSE SAVED OUR WORLD By Ryan Sayles - a bit homophobic possibly (?), gay sex and all the slang references to it appear as a bunch of fun-loving guys take on some alien invaders using the toys at their disposal. Maybe the fact that they triumph and despatch the alien enemy balances the piece, but it kind of came across as a bit juvenile. Sort of schoolboys laughing at a fart in the classroom.

TACO HELL By David James Keaton – fast food which never appears. I sensed the frustration at the non-appearance of the taco. I could feel the protagonist’s pain!

THE BROW BEATING HEAVY LEATHER REPOSSESSION SHUFFLE By Chris Leek – a tale of a car repossession which I enjoyed.

WOOF By Eric Beetner - a man and his talking dog, not his best friend ultimately.

Worse ways to spend a pound and a couple of hour’s reading time.

3 from 5

Read - June 2017
Published – 2013
Page count – 104
Source – purchased copy

Format - Kindle 


  1. I give points for inventiveness here, Col, and I'm glad you found some of these stories entertaining. I'm afraid the collection is probably not for me, though...

    1. Fair enough Margot. It was a bit more hit than miss for me, but not a stand-out collection really.

  2. Mmm they sound very varied. Probably not the collection for me, but glad they passed some time for you.

    1. Moira, agreed. I don't regret reading it and there were some high spots.

  3. Most collections are like that, some good stories, some OK stories, and you just have to check them. But I don't think I need to sample these.

  4. Col – Thanks for the review. I am familiar with some of these writers.

    1. I'm the same, there were two maybe I hadn't heard of before.